The countdown has begun!

This is the last week of class (last day Thurs). Then next week it's study and assessment week. Got 3 assignments and 1 exam next week.
Then the week after, viva and another exam and another assignment.

But thanks to God this semester I'm well, not plagued by headaches, not stressed, I'm happy, the house is relatively tidy, I'm exercising at the gym regularly (very regularly for me, and seeing my endurance improve noticeably!).

I got my first result back for this semester - my DFO exam part A which is 40% of the grade. 
God generously gave me 78.5/80!  Amazing! Well it was an open book exam. No credit to me all to Him!

I'm going to get round to taking a picture of my turtleneck and I've got my hands into my new super chunky yarn that arrived from America on Saturday. I got 2 colours, two different brands to make a cardigan and a vest. Whee! Got massive needles too 15mm! Only $4.99 from spotlight.

I'm SO looking forward to these two weeks finishing then it's summer holidays! Got to get stuck in the garden again, got the ball rolling on the new kitchen, so many improvements to be made to the house. And a weekend in welly late November together, and other exciting things. 

Life rocks at the moment despite a heap of assignments and 2 exams to go. Life with God rocks!

 We had a great time in Wellington just relaxing, eating, drinking, making merry etc. The apartment we stayed in was on the dock so that it was right smack in town and close to everything but minus the noise and traffic. It was a one bedroom, just the right size for us, with a lovely bathroom with underfloor heating. That, I will miss. Everything was so comfy it was impossible not to relax and be happy! We explored town well and truly, shopped a lot, ate amazing food and generally lived it up in the big city. Saw a play, a french film and a comedy improv at a bar. 

The day after we arrived home was our anniversary! After the week-long festivities, we decided to mark the day by going out for a nice dinner at a new flashy restaurant near our house. It didn't disappoint. We didn't take any pics of the food (we would look so unglam and everyone would stare!), or of ourselves (rain- and wind-swept and I remembered why Dunedin life is incompatible with dressing up and wearing makeup.) but we had a lovely time. And then we came home, sat in front of the fire with the rest of the bottle of wine we started at the restaurant and re-read our wedding vows to remind ourselves of what we committed to, and to try with renewed vigour to carry them out as best we can. I don't know what other people think of wedding vows, but they generally don't say "I promise to try and be a good spouse when I feel like it". Those would be easy to keep. But ours promise body and mind etc, very full on so I was glad we went over them. I think husbands and wives need to be reminded of what the promise was, in order to keep them. 

After the weekend L went back to work starting at a new clinic down the hill from us, and this chapter will see us save lots of petrol money cos he walks up and down the hill to/from work, and he also signed up at flashy Les Mills in town. I'll continue to patronise good ol' Unipol. I must say when we went with the free trial passes to Les Mills, I did miss Fitness First. This gym is probably the most flash but still a good long way from the flashy gyms in Singapore. Can't believe they used to even give out workout clothes and provide all kinds of toiletries! Are Singaporeans the most pampered or what! There's no reason why everyone who is a gym member in Singapore shouldn't be super fit! Well I found myself thinking if I didn't have to bring anything except my socks and shoes to the gym, which was the case in FF but no longer here, it would be so convenient to go all the time! Yeah right. I don't remember going that much, though who knows when I get used to this if I ever join a gym in Sg again I will be so awe struck by how convenient it is I'll go... all the time! 

This week I've been taking it easy and enjoying myself by doing whatever I feel like when it takes my fancy. No such luxury when term restarts! I've been making food, reading, doing chores around the house, lots of knitting (still working on that scarf but almost there!)...

Next week I should probably start shifting my body clock away from 10 or 11am getting up times and more towards 6 or 7am. Sigh. And maybe do some reading. The results are starting to come back to us and I hope that motivates me to work harder and prepare more for next sem, although I am fully aware none of this is of my own strength, but God's grace and blessings. When I am weak He is strong, hooray! There is hope for me yet.

Waiting for the firewood guy to deliver 5m3 of firewood but he hasn't rung. Didn't give me an ETA either so I've been pottering around the house within earshot of the phone. Later I'll make a shepherd's pie for dinner. :) This week is probably the most varied in terms of dinner menu cos I've got the time and energy (and equipment, I lately realised is very important) to make nice meals. We had pork-and-prawn dumplings with noodles in homemade chicken stock on Monday, then homemade pizza-from-scratch on Tuesday, then Coq au Vin last night with rice and roasted pumpkin last night, and shepherd's pie tonight. Tomorrow, possible a chicken pilaf or a Turkish lamb something-or-other with pita bread and yoghurt. Also did an Upside Down Apple Cake which tasted lovely but almost caused me a massive rage cos the cake refused to cook properly at first. And finally used up the last of the apples from our tree yesterday making dried apple rings for L to eat with cereal.

Productive and happy! :)

 I suppose I should update.
Haven't achieved much since I got back, except spending a lot of time bonding with my husband :) 
Haven't studied, the garden is a shambles, did do some clearing up, cleaning/housework, have been doing a LOT of washing, which is great, and I knitted a beanie. Picture to come.

Been feeling very much unmotivated, until today. Finally my desperate prayers were answered and I feel renewed interest in life, strength, purpose and self-efficacy. Did all school and household filing/accounting and my desk is clear and ready to take on a new heap of papers and books in the coming weeks. There are 8 weeks til the winter holidays and only 5 of those have classes. Then it'll be assessments and assignments again. It all starts on Monday with a Fieldwork debrief, which is rather zo bo. Then Tues is off for studying, Wed pm exam, Thurs full day and Fri half day Ethics Workshops, whatever that means. I got this all off the draft timetable for next week. Hope that Fri pm stays free cos the man and I are heading away for the weekend woohoo!  Date! 

The weather is still rather good considering it's mid April. Had some wintry days but the temperatures are climbing this week to a high of 17 or 18 again max in the daytime, which is awesome! Sun energises me and gives me go, grey skies do not. And cold temperatures promote inertia and hibernation.

But alas no more hibernation from next week onwards! Body clock, no more slacking! Everyone, back to your positions, holidays are over. Back to school mode!

Made two savoury mince pies for dinner last night and had some leftover filling on potatoes from the garden. (Also used some in the Pureed Chicken and Roasted Pumpkin/Carrot/Garlic soup the night before.)  Considering we didn't plant any of them, God has been generously providing us with late, late potatoes. Since I got home we have had 3 big harvests. It's really fun and satisfying to harvest potatoes from the garden (well especially if you did plant them, which we didn't, so it's just fun for me) because unlike other crops which you eyeball from the time they are tiny and count each flower, leaf and fruit to reassure yourself they are growing, potatoes are a total surprise. You know how many plants there are, but not how many potatoes each will have. So on harvest day you just dig a bit, feel around a bit and one by one they pop up as pleasant little surprises. We have both yellow and red ones and they show up so well against the dark soil. It's lovely :)

Tonight we have another date. We used to go to the gym together before I went to Welly and since I got back as I said I have been super slack but on Wed I did a proper workout, by which I mean a sustained amount of time on cardio machines (30 minutes treadmill, 30 minutes cycle - thanks to iPod) and proper aching muscles the next day (chest, butt, arm - mmm!) from weights. I shall now endeavour to return to my previous routine of gymming every other day (with a measure of flexibility). So tonight after work we start with dinner together at home, then a gym date, then shower and head out for drinks. It's been awhile!

This week I only spent 2 days at my own placement and only 1 with my supervisor. I spent one day at the acute psychiatric ward in town and another at the adolescent acute mental health unit out at Kenepuru.

Both days were very depressing for me.

The first, was depressing because after being away from acute wards and coming back to it I was struck by how it really was the same, whether it was physical or mental health, whether it was Auckland or Wellington, small or big hospital, whether the staff wore uniforms and name badges or casual clothes (and keys around their necks), it was still the same old thing - institutionalisation.

Lack of respect for patients, gossiping about them, not listening, not giving them your full attention, walking away before they can respond to a (closed, rhetorical) question you ask, judging patients by things that really are a matter of personal choice and not a matter of mental health.

At lunchtime I wanted to go home, or back to my own placement, because I was so depressed.

The second day, I was depressed because after hanging out with the kids for a day and playing games, singing songs, eating together, doing stuff together, you realise that is what they really are - just kids. And it's so depressing that they aren't out there doing what other kids their age do. They can't, maybe. They even have to get permission and find someone with a key to get outside into the sun in the courtyard. Like the other acute ward, all the doors are locked! And then of course one particular girl was very depressing because she was catatonic and people who may or may not understand what that is all about were forcing her to do all kinds of things, walking, moving, eating.

My question in mental health is: If a person has the right to refuse treatment for cancer or asthma or whatever, how come a person doesn't have the right to refuse treatment for mental health symptoms? Because they will harm others? Okay fine, they get put under the compulsory treatment order. Because they will harm themselves? Well who made you their mother? A person here has the right to kill themself. Suicide is legal. Treatment can be refused, so why can't food?

There may be times when I am tempted to force a person to do something "for their own good" but I hope I don't get sucked into it. Who made me boss of them or knowing what is best for them? Who says healthcare staff are experts? I reckon rather that the nature of the job attracts power hungry people, who don't really care, and only want to make decisions for people. Not all, but quite a few. To these people I say, go get a life! And make decisions for yourself, spend more time on that, you might benefit from that. Probably their own lives aren't even well thought out. If I ever want to do something "for your own good" may it not be because I treat you as a friend - that's another line not to be crossed. Get things straight. You're a worker, not a mother, not a boss, not an expert and certainly not a friend.

Today I was blue. I think the DP is wearing off and my period is coming. Uncharacteristically, I had carrot cake with icing for dinner and a glass and a half of a lovely Central Otago Pinor Noir and some of yesterday's leftovers when I got back here. Interestingly I had made a beef stew and brown rice, when I was packaging the leftovers I put the rice into the stew to save containers. And today it's become a risotto, lovely! Brown rice doesn't disintegrate as easily as white so still a lovely texture. Also got bought a nice fat book from Borders when I was in town, for downtime, and found of all things, a KnitWorld shop off Cuba St amidst all these quirky shops! Contemplating what combination of merino, cashmere, cotton, silk, possum, alpaca I want for my cardigan at the mo. Won't be able to start until at least I get back to Dunedin.

To bed early then. That would be best for me. And no one can decide that for me, but me. (And God, but He's the ultimate boss so no worries there).

we have been sick! down with some kind of flu-ey thing. both of us have denied responsibility for bringing the bug home, (me from school and him from hospital) but today he suggested it might have been from the kid we were babysitting last weekend, which would explain why we both got sick at the same time. oh well.

today i woke up with a hoarse voice. and boy do i mean hoarse. in the past my voice was described as "husky" but somehow over the years i lost that but today, today, it's definitely "husky" again. *croak*

haven't had a sore throat in ages! or any kind of flu for that matter. even in winter we didn't get properly sick. i've had the sore throat, now it's turned into a hoarse voice. had the runny nose and tickly throat cough and now i'm going into the phlegmy stage. sigh. spent half the night being kept awake by a painful nostril, which i thought was a pressure thing, since it was blocked but couldn't find a position to ease the pressure. it's a tad better today.

it's been so wet and cold and grey. at the moment it's 8 or 9 degrees! summer too! it's a work day today, both of us have tonnes of work to do.

in other news, i finally uploaded pics of my halter top! here it is :)

From LJ pics

From LJ pics

we had a great weekend, in terms of weather, which is when you need it really. when you're stuck in class who cares if it's hailing or whatever? thank God for giving us lovely blue skies and sunny days and a much appreciated bit of warmth again! it's funny how it can be super hot one week and then next week super wintry, and when it's cold i totally cannot remember ever being hot and when it's hot i can't remember how i could have felt cold!

anyway after a first week of classes that felt like much longer than that, i was happy to have a bit of a rest. well there weren't any sleep-ins cos we are both determined to keep the body clock set to the right timings. friday night we had a date, went to eat at the lovely yaki tori place. gorgeous food! and i really enjoyed the tapas-style eating, little plates of delectable morsels instead of one huge plate of food which gets boring halfway through. i think i could do tapas style every meal if only i had the time and opportunity. on saturday we went to babysit for several hours. the boy was having a nap when we arrived and even after chatting to the parents for almost a good hour, then chasing them off to have their valentine's day lunch date, we still had a good 2 more hours of absolute quiet during which both of us managed to do a bit of work (i sat in the sun too! lovely!) before he woke up. apparently he was a bit sick and would have been normal to be cranky but he was lovely with us and i must say i had lots of fun watching the man interact with him - this is the first time i have seen the husband try to relate to a toddler - this the man who studiously avoids pregnant women and children haha! maybe he'll warm up to them in the course of his GP practice, simply because it can't be avoided!

although this semester i had big plans not to work during the weekend and work like 8-6 on weekdays there was so much to do this weekend. not only school work but house work too. this semester is so busy that the plan is to do all the cooking for the week in the weekend so that on weekdays when we get home late (the husband will pick me up from the library after work and we'll come home together) and don't have time to energy to cook, we'll still have healthy proper meals instead of resorting to takeaways or crap food!

in fact i have big plans this semester, mostly to do with time use. i feel myself in a new phase, one of trying to do all the thinking and planning ahead so that i have a routine i can simply execute with no stress. the thinking part is what takes up the most time i reckon, more so for myself, because i can't avoid thinking until i believe i have the most efficient plan. see? takes a lot of time.

so the plan is to be dropped off in the morning by the husband who will then drive out of town, then work til 6pm or so when he can pick me up, thereby minimising the amount of school work i need to do on the weekend, which can be then used to cook and try and maintain the house in small doses. not much planting this year, a bit of amending the soil. gym three times a week to balance my life with all that studying. though it'll be hard to have any kind of routine this semester cos it's so broken up. 4 weeks here, then 5 weeks placement, then 2 weeks holiday, then back to class etc.. it'll be over in a flash!

i have also been incubating ideas for my next knitting project. i think it'll be warm, sort of autumn/spring, wool of some sort but not scratchy (maybe merino/possum?) possibly a dark red, long, with buttons and maybe a tie front, hmmmm..... i'll have to think it up and try and design a pattern because i have such specific criteria that i almost never find a pattern that is exactly what's in my head so i'll have to work on something i can make variations to.... hmmmm...

we're off on our holiday this friday so i've been trying to do some work in the garden/house as necessary. once school starts i will barely have time to cast a glance on the chore list!

planted out 10 okra plants yesterday and another 6 today. they're the 'Burgundy' type so i wasn't too fussed about chucking them anywhere i found space, since the flowers are meant to be really pretty. i hope so!

i've had a fun time this season beginning mid/late winter with the planning/fantasizing about what plants to grow from seeds. i ordered some seeds from what seems to be a rather large nursery that trades online and had fun growing what normally isn't available from garden shops. it's been mostly experimental, and i've learnt (surprisingly without much heartache) what grows and what dies almost immediately. and what doesn't even germinate (only borage. why? why? why? oh and stevia)

i think i might take a break from sowing (though i can't seem to stop thinking about how best to construct a raised no dig bed for winter crops, which if i set up now-ish, will mature til March just in time for the seedlings to go in. but i think it's a smarter move to resist taking on new endeavours and try and go back to basics, spruce up the enormous garden that isn't the vegetable beds, and generally improve the soil. there's also the thinking that we're not going to be here much past 4ish years (well depends also on market picking up again so it's hard to say) so by time the soil is lovely and rich i'll be gone and have to start from scratch! but it's all a learning process and i must say i'm happy that eventually i'll be able to teach my own children some real practical skills, rather than stuff like "if y = x2 +2x -24, find x and y" (yawn).

i'm also torn about buying new yarn for another big knitting project or closing shop for school cos once term begins i don't want to be distracted by the urge to complete whatever i'm knitting. and i don't want to have half done projects lying around either. it's been a productive summer knitting wise, seeing as i only picked it up couple of months ago. to date, i have successfully knitted 2 pairs of toddler socks for my nieces, a pair of me-size socks, a beanie for the man, a halter top, a lace headband and i'm now doing a mug cozy just for a quick fun thing. contrary to what lots of other knitters claim on their blogs, i think kitchener stitch is a joy to do (that's what you use to close up the sock toe, for example, and it is an invisible seam cos it continues the knit pattern) and i can tell i'm a dpn (double pointed needles, for knitting in-the-round as opposed to flat pieces which you then stitch together) girl too. nice to be developing my own style and preferences, like a knitting personality.

anyway, gong xi fa cai everyone!! wan shi ru yi, bu bu gao sheng, xue ye jin bu, kuai gao zhang da, zao sheng gui zi etc...

1. The hot weather is back YIPPEE!!! In fact it was too hot to work in the garden yesterday. Plus I was overwhelmed by the idea and execution of converting one of the back beds to a veggie patch, preferably raised. Decided to sleep on it, draw up some plans, and be real systematic about it.

2. Had a lovely time at the RB pub last night listening to the Calder Prescott quartet. Man are these old (and do I mean OLD) men happening! The husband kept saying he felt like he was on a cruise ship while I was wondering how the vocalist managed to sound exactly like Louis Armstrong. Practice? Loved it though. Must become regulars. Rather interesting conversation with Y and N too, about identity, culture, migrating, settling etc

3. Can't get into gmail! Why the heck not? Is anyone having trouble with this??? This is the third day and this is NOT ACCEPTABLE!

4. So the halter top called for 6 balls and I only used 3. Therefore I have 3 balls left. Because I don't want to start developing a STASH, I am thinking of what to knit this into. So far, I'm about halfway through a lace headband, as an introduction to lace work. Not bad so far. But what next? Gotta be something smaller than a halter top ;)

5. I changed my name at Polytech! Went in to do my enrolment for this year and officially changed my family name. :) Of course the man almost didn't want to accept the marriage cert cos it's all scribbled on (the story is that normally the couple gets the original license and the registrar gets a carbon copy. A wind took the original copy away so the priest gave us the carbon copy, cancelling and rewriting the line "This copy to be returned to the registrar" as "This copy to be given to parties of the marriage". And we had to go over some writing that didn't carbon copy out well. DUH of course it looks pirated!) and I didn't think it was such a big thing, changing my name, but after I left the office I felt warm and happy and as if it were a momentous event. I should probably also change my name on my driver license and then from now on, practice writing A Loh on everything :) :) :) I love being married to my husband! *grin*