feeling better but persistent cough is really annoying at night. had two nights of quite good sleep (only one major coughing fit per night) but not so good a night last night. both of us tired and sleepy today (plus i had an early start!)

as for work, i came home after supervision today still feeling a bit worried. finished what i was trying to finish last night and headed out into the garden as it was such a lovely sunny windy day. potted up 12 dwarf bok choi seedlings and one lot of mesclun seedlings. :) happiness!

today it occurred to me i like gardening so much because it's partnering with God in the act of creation. woo.

followed someone's link online to a discussion on some online newspaper about whether one should get the latest i phone or wait for the next one. i actually browsed it a bit with an open mind to see what exactly, if anything, i was missing in my life. after reading couple lines about the astounding new features/improvements, i clicked away, feeling very, very tired. how do people have energy to think so much about such trivial things? should i get this or that phone? who cares? should i get this one or the next one - again, who cares? consuming, consuming, consuming - very tiresome business. i have no patience for tedious repetitive life activities, like eating, moisturising, and definitely buying new "stuff". yawn.

like this banner ad right now on the top of my page. it's some new community about celebrities and gossip. one more time altogether now... WHO CARES?

there are better things to do with my time and energy i think.

and i should be feeling excited, but i'm not. instead i feel somewhat blue and overwhelmed. (too tired to elaborate). pray for sleeping through the night with no coughing fits thanks!

though don't be surprised if there's snow next week... that's exactly the kind of thing that happens here.

i have come to realise that i usually post in here after i've been out in the garden. why is that? cos i have time and mental space to think about things? cos gardening is so therapeutic? today i was weeding the herb garden and thinking to myself that 1) dandelions are so brazen, growing in the middle of other plants! 2) dandelions are so dramatic, if you pull even one leaf they all fall off and you end up with bunch of leaves in your hand and the fat juicy root still in there. the leaves break off perfectly at the tip of the root too. (the trick is to grab the entire plant, and pull it as a whole, and gently. even the shrivelled up, dried up outside leaves as well, as a whole. they're very communitarian)

while doing this i was clearing large handfuls of old sage leaves from inside and around the base of the plant. and i thought, i wonder if this is what people pay money for in supermarkets? dried sage leaves in wee packets costing an arm and a leg? and here i was clearing them in large handfuls to toss on the compost. we are lucky to have a herb garden and i'm keen to see them come back strongly this summer. the oregano is a bit of a hussy, wee shoots cozying up in the middle of quite a few other plants. but i don't mind. love the pale green fuzzy aromatic-ness! as i was doing the sage a confused bee came charging toward me. i stepped aside and let him verify that there were actually no sage flowers (bees LOVE sage, and other blue/purple flowers) yet, and when he was satisfied he buzzed away. i think even the dried leaves were that aromatic, got his hopes up!

another beautiful day. spent most of it inside and for the first time, actually teaching a class! went quite ok, and one more tut group tomorrow. not sure how people can repeat the same lecture over and over because i was bored by the second one. and felt like i was repeating myself. but every performance is new and unique right?

dinner with friends tonight and a very busy social weekend planned. and then hons sch after the weekend. it's all go! which is not a bad thing at all.

so what did we do in class today? i love this course because of the exposure and opportunity to try new interesting things that people do. i think i might have a new hobby - spinning poi!

it doesn't matter how slow i'm progressing with my results as long as I'm progressing, I reckon.

Today was a lovely blue sky day. i stayed home so that i could work and do some other stuff in between. hate wasting a warm sunny day! so I did some washing (love putting washing out on the line!) and some baking (nigella's breakfast bar which have become a staple in our house - this is my third batch already in a few weeks) and some weeding (a whole barrowload). glad to see the soil is so fertile judging from the size of the weeds! some of the hydrangea cuttings i randomly put in the ground are also shooting, which is fab! i love seeing the garden come to life!

the other thing i really love being part of is witnessing the changes in the garden. i could forgive a non gardener thinking that year in, year out weeding and planting must be boring except for the change in plants sowed. not in our garden. every year i'm surprised by some new gem that i didn't plant and hadn't seen last year. and i'm talking about things like daffodils, which don't propogate by some bird dropping or wind gusting. it's weird but true. there are some huge daffodils in places in the garden that definitely did not have daffodils last year. hmmm. also found some wee hyacinth which i have been thinking about on and off for a couple of seasons. was so surprised but so pleased to see them. wonder if more will pop up?

pet-wise, we are honing in on a cockatiel i think. spent a lot of time reading about and watching videos of this cute wee bird too.

i love this sort of change :)

i've been quite anxious and blah recently because i hadn't had the chance to catch up with my supervisor and i didn't think i was on the right track for my coding and analysis wasn't going anywhere. but finally after like 2.5 of not seeing her we managed to catch up yesterday and i left feeling ridiculously happy and smiling to myself the rest of the evening because of the support, encouragement and affirmation she gave me.

i've been really lucky with this supervisor because she's really experienced and while earlier i was worried that she isn't really in the "system" so to speak because she left the school for many years and isn't one of the lecturers well versed in the hons programme, it's proved to be a benefit. and she's really, really generous with her time to me. and unfailingly supportive. (was even inspired to jot a few lines for my acknowledgements!)

so all is good and spring has sprung officially on 1 sept and i'm feeling upbeat generally. i think i've over magnified the size of this task. it's really only 6 chapters and i've got drafts going on 3 of them. so it really isn't that bad!

still wondering what we ought to get as a pet. a cat would be easy and quite ideal, but the man is allergic (and me mildly). a dog is gonna take awhile more. a fish might be boring, a bird might be messy. chooks? bunnies?

gonna get out and sow some bok choi and choy sum seeds this weekend. i recently dug in our second load of bokashi and feeling pleased about that. already got my eye on where to dig in the next lot, which i predict is still some months away. but still, whee!

that's funny, didn't realise the topic(s) of this post are sorta... opposing? are they?

anyway i am feeling a bit better about my analysis gradually... although i haven't had a proper supervision session for awhile (she's been busy with her own writing deadlines) but i am now convinced that i am learning what "iterative process" means and why research textbooks are so vague about this part of the process - because there is no right formula or fixed step by step method! funny that, the rest of the process is so structured and formulaic.

this week is sunny and beautiful and that always gets me optimistic and looking to the future, which i am! summer is in the air (and spring is only just springing - weather is such a random thing) this week, even getting up to the teens i think. that's amazing seeing as how only a week ago we were struggling to hit 5 degrees in the day and 0 at night. wow.

this week the husband is working out in the country and he gets to enjoy the early signs of spring (new lambs! we saw some on the weekend) in the country.

have been getting in touch with some friends about catching up at the turn of the year. and it seems like other years everyone goes back for christmas/ny (except me) and this year i go back and people are leaving the country and moving away! as usual, the recurring theme in my life (well one of them) is my life rhythms. a bit out of sync. but anyway still going to catch up with whoever's around and free. it is a pretty long trip so hopefully i can catch some anyway, busy big city people! last night i was looking at some old pics of my friends at various gatherings and i felt a pang. i think i don't really realise how long i have been away. and i was anxious about whether i would or could still fit in. have i changed too much? have i missed too much?

looking forward to when i get an income too. partly so that i can travel a bit more but more because i'm really looking forward to a clinical job where i am not stuck in front of the computer all day long. replied a lecturer's email recently, it was maybe half an hour since she sent it and as soon as i replied she sent a reply back to say "This may be a personal question but do you live on your keyboard" - to which the answer is YES of course. well this year anyway. but that is set to change! Despite what people think, I am really ready to stop being a student next year, oh for a year or two anyway. :p I'm really glad my future job is gonna be working with diverse people, in real life situations in the community and problem solving and being resourceful and creative. My theatre background and backpacking days have served me well!

When summer comes round I'm gonna be out in the garden as well, can't wait to get back to it! got other big plans for fun things to do when this phase of my life is over. i can see i'll be in the same camp as my friend who wonders how she'll find time to work amongst all the things she does in her life. true, true, there are so many meaningful and fun things to do (even though I know I will love my work - but work isn't everything!). Things to learn and things to do, love it!

Well last night I started a new thing, maybe not "Started" but had a try. There was this online deal for 4 lessons at a pole fitness place in town. and i had read about it when they opened up and thought it might be interesting, certainly the videos i've seen and articles i've read about it being a new fitness craze have been interesting and looks like something that would get you really fit cos you carry your own body weight and move against gravity a lot. the stereotyped sex dancers image is obsolete (though there are still some of course) and the new look is athletic and elegant, like ballet/gymnastics on a pole.

and boy is it hard work! it's fun, because you don't notice you are working out until you stop (and the room stops spinning :p) and then you realise how puffed you are. there were 3 other girls learning with me and we were all puffed. plus the leg lifts and push ups for strengthening... i have a new admiration for the dancers who sort of swing themselves up and down, upside down, languidly spinning in mid air and doing all sorts of incredible movements that make me think - you must be 100% muscle to do that. today i'm definitely feeling it all over and i mean ALL over. but it wasn't dodgy at all as i half-feared. it was heaps of fun and i'm looking forward to next week's class. :)

it's okay, we survived. well eventually the front moved north (some delighted aucklanders i think there were) and the husband came home on Wed night. yay. and gradually the snow melted away leaving a terribly boggy lawn. the citrus are NOT HAPPY. the mediterranean herbs are NOT HAPPY. there are still piles of very dirty snow along the roads but the ground is drying up, which is nice. i even saw the blue sky again today and i think there might even have been sun! wow it's funny how a few days of all white/grey makes one forget what blue sky and sunshine look like.

i spotted buds on the plum tree, that makes me feel so spring-y. and the tulips have put out new leaves. spring sure is trying to spring! that makes me happy. even if its still freezing the days are getting longer. and the minimum temperature is slowly creeping back up to above 0 and the max temps are even getting close to double digits! hooray!

this weekend apparently there will be an import of I don't know how many tonnes of snow for some big event in the centre of town. hmm. i know this was probably organised awhile ago, but, um, WHY?? definitely making a big effort to avoid it. i think our city is over snow, thanks. hairbrained idea! i bet it's really expensive to put this up - we saw some ramps being built maybe for skiiers or snowboarders? again, um, WHY??

have been making some progress in my work which is good. i am getting more and more restless for summertime! holidays! graduation! get my life back! whee!

Look at this. Polar blast hits entire country, snow even up in Auckland, worst in year etc etc, widespread snow, hail and gales, but look at wee ol' nelson!




the rest of the time, ok the country just has the usual, cloudy, rainy, cold. but even in polar blast time nelson escapes with its usual sunny sun sun!

sigh.

as an aside, it's been incredible to watch the weather from the very-windowed kitchen/back living area. i was reminded of forrest gump's "raining from the sides" when the snow started coming really strongly horizontally because of the wind. pretty weird!

however this is teaching me several things for which i am grateful:
1) reminder of who's in charge and in control. not me.
2) reminder that God knows what we need and gives us what we NEED not WANT - ie enforced break from work for the man that he really needed last week, heaps of rest time, "me time" and male bonding with his travel companion
3) at least he's got a travel companion - grateful for that too (and I'm luckier than his wife cos i have no young child to mind alone!)
4) i am self sufficient and safe at home - got heaps of food and wood (and THANK GOD for our new roof to hold the weight of all that snow - I thank God for M who advised us to do it when it didn't seem at all likely we'd need a roof to resist tonnes of snow - remember Noah?)

and THANK GOD i'm not in charge of directing the weather, or planes, or traffic of any kind. i can just hide out at home and chill (literally lol) for a few days until the big thaw out.

got up, opened the curtains, nothing. bit grey, but no winter wonderland. decided to get going and see what happened. minutes later, here we go! snow started swirling around... i opted not to leave the house in order not to risk being stuck in town with the car. so the rest of the day i took my day off as planned and did anything but work. it was lovely, really. knitted most of the body of my bolero (except seaming and sleeves) and made food and watched the weather outside.

it was pretty surreal. throughout the day it changed a lot. one minute the sky was blue and sun was shining, the next it was all white out and you couldn't see the top of the hills. hail changed to rain changed to snow changed to sleet. the wind howled and shook everything. i even heard thunder twice (didn't know snow showers came with thunder!) and that was pretty alarming.

thank God I had stacked the wood under the front porch so I have a huge supply of dry wood (some with a light dusting of snow) for the next few days. thank God the porch faces north and west, not south and west. i hadn't realised before today how well designed the back garden is in having thick vegetation along the south border. you could really tell the snow was coming from the south and the south side of everything was caked in snow. had a random though: snow is like dandruff, it floats and sticks to everything!

today L did not make it home but he is safe in a hotel near the airport. tomorrow they try again. i had prayed hard for him to return tonight but in these conditions hazardous is an understatement. i therefore put everything in God's able hands and i'm not going to worry about it. he'll return safely when God decides it's a good time, so that's good. he and his party are tired but safe, which is good.

the forecast is the same for another 2 days ("bitter southerly gales" - whee!) but i think in daylight it will be better. today the dunedin airport was landing planes albeit a bit delayed, all the way until dark.

my friends were predictably stuck where they were and couldn't get into dunedin, oh well. i couldn't have made it down the hill anyway.

winter, oh winter, are you done yet? (i pity the poor round 2 buds and blossoms!)

although it certainly *looks* like spring, it might be another false alarm...

the blossoms on the ornamental cherry have bloomed once (earlier, midwinter - tricked by the mildness) and fallen off once (post big dump of snow). the tulips are coming up. the big blossom trees in town are all awash with pink and white. there're buds. i've heard rumours about new calves.

but look at the forecast for the next few days!



hmmm. seeing as we get marooned on the hill when it snows, i might be stuck indoors for a few days.

on a related note, why is it that when people come to visit (Y and her family last time and the J family this time) it always snows? Is the city trying to give visitors a false impression?

well, at least they get a proper southern winter welcome :p i sure hope L's plane will be able to arrive when it's meant to tomorrow.